Monday, November 23, 2009

It Might Be Time To Move


I've been thinking this for a while, and this may just be what does it.  Apparently it's not enough to have mysterious holes appearing in my yard.  Now I have to contend with mammoth arachnids as well.

Whilst doing some yard work, I felt something brush against my shoulder and neck.  A quick glance to one side revealed the most perfectly spun web I've seen in awhile, dusted in fine brown pollen.  Then I noticed its maker scrambling away.  But for the grace of who knows what, this nasty thing would surely have sunk its fangs into my neck.




I mean really!  Giant spiders?  There's water on the other side of those bushes.  Why couldn't it be a harmless alligator?  Next I'll probably get into a fight with one of the many pythons slithering through the Everglades.  At least those are big enough I might see it coming.  A guy was bitten by a green mamba a few months ago.  Yeah, I thought they only came in black too.  But greens are plenty deadly, and better camouflaged.  Man, what I wouldn't give for the safety of an igloo right about now.





That's a normal sized baseball, only a couple inches in front of this behemoth.


I really think the web looks pretty cool here.  I'm pretty sure it's a Banana Spider.  Harmless, but terrifying.

10 comments:

Mary said...

*shudder*

Angela said...

Banana spiders--are those the ones that eat birds or do i have my arachnids crossed?

Matt said...

I don't know what they eat. Hopefully not me.

Natalie said...

I don't really mind spiders--even giant ones but once we found a dead snake in our yard and it FREAKED ME OUT! At least they aren't poisonous :)

Matt said...

Better a dead snake than a live one. And I've seen those. And they are poisonous.

Tina Lynn said...

Drop what you're doing and leave now!

Girl with One Eye said...

He's pretty. For whatever's sake don't send him over to Howard's. He'll never make it out alive.

Erica said...

OMG I had about three different types of heebie jeebies during this post. So sorry you have to deal with it, but happy you didn't get bit. We need ya around and stuff... :)

Jm Diaz said...

As esthetically pleasing as your picture are, that thing is giving me the creeps. And I'm leaving to Florida Tomorrow night. Awesome!

Matt said...

Jm - With any luck these things will get their fill of Turkey before they spot you. Although this one's still in my yard if your looking for a pet.